It has always been difficult to separate my desire to create art from my need to earn money. Recently I have been feeling that a weight has been lifted. I am feeling free of some inner obstacles that have always been present. I'm beginning to separate myself from the notion of creating things that I might be able to sell. I'm seeing an image now of what that would be like and some of the possibilities of what I might create. I had an aha moment and suddenly I feel an urge to create the art that I want the way that I want. Right now it seems more possible than ever before.
Art to please myself!
Ideally I should have time, three or six months or even a year to figure out and explore with no strings attached, the wide world of art on my own terms. How luxurious it would be to create freely with no obligation, no need to make something that will sell. What a healthy thought! I would love to be allowed the opportunity to try 20 different things that don't quite work and still not be disappointed. With a need for money no longer in the equation, I could dive in with a childlike wonder and respect and likely acquire a mastery of technique in the process!
I had this thought last week and said out loud to Timothy. He said enthusiastically that I could have one month. I said okay though in my mind I know that I will take more.